One week old

So today marks the one week mark for Quinn. We are adjusting to our new lives fairly well. It's amazing to me how every single day he changes in color and in shapes. I still cannot tell who he resembles, but I can definitely see both his father and I in him. It doesn't look as though he is going to be dark in color. I think he might be that perfect mocha color that mixed babies bring.

We are eating well, pooping well and all the other "good" things newborns have!

The last three nights, we've slept through the night with the one hour exception x2 to eat and change our diapers.

I never thought I would welcome my milk coming in, but it has saved me sleep this last week!

I feel blessed. He is the light of my life and I am completely smitten!! I cannot wait to take him out hiking and walking around the city, to the beach and out to dinner with friends!

Quinn Alexandar

Quinn above is just about 24 hours old.
Quinn in an Anne Geddes position that he put himself in at day 4.

My son, Quinn Alexandar was 12 days late and weighing in at 7.11 and 20 inches long. He was born on November 25th at 7:18am. APGAR score of 8/9 only due to the fentanyl I received. He was a bit sleepy, but alert when coerced, good color and excellent reflexes. All is perfect with this little boy!

Labor was LONG! I was in labor for 36 hours and in active labor from seven pm until his birth at 7:18am.

Here is my labor story:

I was due to have an appointment on Monday the 23rd for an amniotic fluid check and fetal check. At that time, they were going to make one more final attempt to sweep my membranes with the hopes of throwing me into labor that night. I chose to allow them to induce me that day so I would be pregnancy free and baby in my arms within 24 hours. That day, they gave me mesoproxil? which is a cervical dilator. I had contractions through the entire day that lasted from a minute to 1.5 minutes. That night, they gave me fentanyl and morphine to allow me to sleep b/c they were under the assumption that I would be delivering the following day. I did not need the additional cervidil b/c my contractions were 2 minutes apart at 9pm when they checked me before bed.

Tuesday morning, I was told that because I was induced, I could NOT labor in water. This was awful and shattered my plans of hypnobirthing, even though the previous day I got through the contractions with the hypnobirthing techniques. Hypnobirthing and water birthing go hand in hand, but some woman can use it without water. I guess I just had these grand plans and was not intending of going off base from them. What a let down. Needless to say, I made the decision to get an epidural. I felt so defeated:( My birth plan was basically shattered at that point b/c I was against the epidural completely until I realized my labor was going to be very long and I was running out of fuel. They also started pitocin and fluid resuscitation. Talk about FLUID OVERLOAD! OMG, I came out of birth looking like the pillsbury dough girl!! And, I'm still diuresing to this moment!

Anyhow,

I was given the epidural and only the left side was working. The right side was not and even though the on call anesthesiologist came in to try and fix it, it did not work. The good thing about this was I could feel the entire birth and was able to feel my water bag break at 715 pm on Tuesday evening. They turned the epidural off completely because they were also giving me fentanyl for break through contraction pain. That stuff threw me out of the loop. STRONG STUFF! Around 3:30am, my nurse came in and asked me the last time I was checked and of course, I couldn't remember b/c I was so "out of it". She then checked me and said, "oh my darling, you are fully dilated to 10 and your babies head it right there, we are going to start pushing in an hour.

"An hour!!" I thought! WThell. There was an emergency c-section going down, so b/c I'm low risk, I have to wait. Ahhh, I guess it gave me a moment to take everything in and prepare myself for the pain I was about to endure!

At 4:15am, I began pushing and pushing and pushing for the next three hours. The last thing I remember, the MD came in and said "Ok Kat, your babies heart rate has dropped to 71, you need to push him out right now, ok?"

I just remember saying a quick prayer to God to help me through because I was soooo beyond tired and I pushed him out in 2 tries!

AMAZING and triumphant all around. I did it, I gave birth to my first child even though my birth plan didn't play out as I wanted. He was a healthy baby boy and is the light of my life!! I'm smitten and damn I feel blessed and lucky that I was given this gift!

Today, I'm still recovering from the agony and traumatic stress of child birth. Everyday gets better and everyday I'm figuring it all out and am able to walk better and actually clean my place up a little. My mom is here to help me with everything and has been amazing. Thanks mom. She cooks me things and gets things for me since it's so difficult to move as fast as I normally do. She's been great and sadly, is leaving on Tuesday!

But in the end, she was the one who caught Quinn and cut his umbilical cord which I know she will remember forever!

It's an "official" feeling!

I am going to be pregnant forever! I don't understand this process. I've been healthy throughout my entire pregnancy, I made a birth plan and now it could be squashed in a matter of days if I do not start labor within 4 days. I will be laboring the entire time in the hospital, hooked up to an iv with pitocin running though my veins, waiting to birth my baby! Not exactly how I planned this first birth with my first child. There goes all of the natural techniques I have lined up. Perhaps I'm jumping the gun and should remain with that sliver of hope to get me through? It's hard and I'm becoming more and more discouraged because everyone texts me and calls me asking if I'm in labor or if baby is here.

I'm frustrated. I've tried so many things to get things moving. Evening primrose oil, orgasms, pineapple, walking all over, my membranes were swept, I ate prego pizza and even spicy food. I even have an appointment for acupuncture tomorrow, along with getting my membranes swept again.

Hmm..

My little one is so comfy inside and I cannot blame him really. Living inside a warm space where you're being fed, there are no loud noises and not much stress. Comfort, pure comfort.

Dear son:

I love you and I want to meet you, please help mommy accomplish this. It would be lovely if you make the decision to come out to play today or tonight. So many people are anxious to meet you and I am anxious to stare into your eyes in complete awe. I will try to be patient and allow nature to take it's course. But just know that we're running out of time and they may have to induce me here in 4 days. I love you.

Love mom...

Prego Pizza

So today I've decided upon recommendation from a stranger at the dog park, to go and try an "infamous" pizza that has been known to throw overdue women into labor. I am not even sure what to expect out of it, but at this point I am willing to at least try it and see if it will work. It's a lot easier to put down than castor oil, this is for certain.

I'm two days overdue now and have been walking and trying other "natural" ways to get things moving, but nothing's working.

So we figure, "what the heck, let's go have us some "Prego Pizza".....

Next blog will hopefully be the start of my labor blog:) Wish me luck tonight!!

Out of the loop

I've been neglecting my blog that I really wanted to do good with. I've been busy with work, packing and moving, then unpacking and nesting. Baby was due yesterday and is still incubating. Apparently he is happy inside the womb. I have had minor stomach aches and constant Braxton Hicks contractions, but no loss of the infamous "mucus plug" or any sign of my membranes rupturing. I'm more tired than normal, but I think when you're carrying around a 7+ lb baby inside you, I guess that is grounds for added fatigue. My mom arrived on the 9th and I was soooo worried that she was going to miss his birth. lol..not even close!

In the meantime, I've been walking a lot and I've had a few glasses of wine to relax my anxiety; neither which have worked. I don't plan on drinking castor oil or any herbs. He will come when he is ready to come and I will patiently wait it out.

Dear son,

I'm getting excited by the minute. My phone continues to ring off the hook with everyone wanting to know when you're making your grand entrance into this world. It's nerve wracking knowing that you are coming soon, but not so soon. I happen to think you're going to wait out the weekend and that is kind of a bummer.

We're ready for you though. Gran gran knit you a beautiful hat and mittens for the cold weather you are going to endure when you are born; it's just that time of year.

The diaper service has started, all of your clothes are washed and waiting to be used and there are plenty of people with ants in their pants to come and meet you:)

How am I doing you ask? Well, I'm still sleeping pretty well and moving around, although sometimes it is really difficult if you know what I mean!

Oh and Sherlock? He is aware you're on your way out, he is all over me and always wanting to be held or pet. He's just layin' around the house waiting for his dog walker to pick him up b/c he knows what that means!

Anyhow, we're all very excited to meet you, hold you and welcome you to this world with all the love we have to offer. Here's to meeting you soon and I definitely mean soon please:) xxo

Love mommie!

Friends and babies

I've found that my social circle is changing. Most of my friends who are single and not knocked up are not really inviting me out anymore. The phone calls get less and less and the invites all together for social outings has nearly come to a halt. At the same time, I also seem to be gravitating towards women who have children, whether single or married. It's interesting the way life works. I admit, I am still that "wild child" who likes to get dolled up with her vintage boots, cigarette pants and funky top for a night of dancing. That part of me will never die.

It's amazing what pregnancy will do to you. Women gravitate towards you and want to talk about your baby, your due date and how great you look, etc. Men on the other hand will make eye contact and smile. As they scan my body, you see them immediately look the other way; baggage I guess.

I love the idea babysrus has. They have not only handicap parking at the very front, but expectant mothers to be directly next to their handicap parking:) Ahhh..there are definitely "perks" to being pregnant!

Today I had my first of the start of my "two week" midwife appointments. It marks a significant milestone in my pregnancy, b/c the "big day" is only 6 weeks away! I am 33 weeks and 4 days today and I measured at 32cm. I didn't gain any weight; probably because I am on my feet for 12 hours during the day while working. Or, perhaps it's luck. Or, I am going to blow up here in a few weeks before giving birth!

Dear son,

I've come up with a few more names for you that I like. I'm pretty sure I'm going to pick my top three names, meet you and then name you. I'm feeling pretty strong about seeing you before naming you! You have these corky habits while inside the womb, I cannot imagine naming you before meeting you. You love to kick and wriggle around. Today I watched as you moved from the right of my abdomen, all the way to the left side near my back! Talk about bizarre!!

I still cannot figure out your sleep patterns. You definitely are not a fan of my alarm clock. You immediately start kicking me as if to say "turn that thing down." Sometimes I feel you kicking at 3am when I get up for my midmorning bathroom break. Most of the time though, you're sleeping. The other day in the shower when I tapped on my tummy as I was talking to you and you jumped and it made me jump. I never thought I would feel you jump in the womb. But, I promise to try and not scare you like that again sweetie! Keep kicking and growing my son:)

Love mom xxo

Weeks 31 and 32

Wow, I am now 8 weeks out! A bit scary, but very exciting to meet him and not be pregnant anymore. As I've stated before, I'm not a fan of being pregnant at all. I'm just a sensitive girl and pregnancy is uncomfortable to me!

These past couple of weeks things began to fall into place. I found a place over in Oakland, Montclair area in the east bay. It's a very cute one bedroom with a washer and dryer, parking and a 182 sf bedroom!! It's a beautiful apartment in a great area with lots of sunlight, central heating, air conditioner, a ton of storage under the house and my own personal outside garden! I'm renting from personal landlords who are low key and super kewl! I can start moving in on the 6th of October. I'm going to take my time moving in so I can decorate and set up baby things!

I'll post up pictures of the apartment when I'm done putting it together.

Hopefully before the little one comes.

I started my hypnobirthing classes this past week. I am happy that I registered for it. They taught us deep breathing techniques to breathe through the contractions and honestly, it all makes perfect sense! Why wouldn't anyone want to breathe through the pain? I have two more classes left and I am really looking forward to them. My coach is my friend from work, she is also a nurse. We're setting things up for the big day and it's fun. This coming week I am going to pack my bag for the hospital and gather up some music and make myself a few birth cd's. I have a friend coming from Sacramento to be a part of the birth and film it for me. It's all falling into place and it's exciting!!

Dear little one:

Although the big day is creeping upon us, you're still finding ways to move and wriggle inside the womb. I still get your random kicks and your funny movements around that I can watch and laugh at.

I hope you like the way I read stories. I know I'm not the most fun at reading them, but I promise you, your mother is ANIMATED and there will NEVER be a dull moment in your growing up! I picture myself dancing in front of you and singing at the top of my lungs while you sit and laugh at me. And believe me when I say that you will laugh at me!!! Your mom is damn funny; you'll see.

So what do you think of the idea of being multilingual? I love the idea of you being bilingual in French and English. By the time you're in junior high, you will be learning Spanish and then Italian and then Russian and then .....

ok, maybe 3 or 4 languages is enough;)

I will be happy with just two:)

Keep growing baby boy!!

xxoo

Week 29 and 30

It seems to get more and more difficult to sit down and write in this very necessary blog. I'm finding that I'm becoming a much better multi-tasker as every day passes by, but at the same time; a bit lazy.

.

Midwife appt at 30 weeks. New statistics are as follows: Fundus is 30.5 cm at 30 weeks. Right on target little one:) I gained 2 additional pounds which now brings my total to 22 lbs. Current weight is 140lbs. Breasts are 35; hardly going up in size. To be honest with you, I was eagerly awaiting their personal growth! Hips are 41!! Wow, the ONE area on my body I would prefer to stay at its old size of 37!

I feel good these days, with a bit of a back ache here and there and work is becoming a bit more overwhelming these days; although I'm trying to maintain my focus! I hope to continue working up until 2-3 weeks before delivery. We'll see. I'm also trying to move and that will have me going on maternity leave a bit sooner to pack and unpack my stuff before the big event! No, I will NOT be moving my stuff, I will have my lovely friends do that favor for me:) They've already offered!

In the 29th week, my best friend surprised me and came up to visit for two days. It was good to see her. She is not going to come to my baby shower. Instead coming after the baby is born. I would rather that than come up for my shower.

Although I some days feel just "full of baby" and stretched out to no end, there are some perks to being pregnant. Mainly, the special treatment I get from people everywhere. Ahhh, it's days like those I'm a happy pregnant woman. But, let it be known that I am very much ok to do things myself without any sort of special treatment from anyone! I'm still zipping around and no, I'm not waddling! Someone said to me the other night. "Oh, you're so cute pregnant and you're not waddling!!"

Wow, I didn't know I was suppose to "waddle". Although I have to admit, when I see certain women sort of walking like a duck and they're smaller than me, I have to think perhaps they know something I don't. Perhaps it is more comfortable on your back when you walk that way?

Hmm..

No, I think I will stick to my regular straight walking, thank you.

Before I go, I know many people keep wanting to know the babies name and I still have NOT figured it out yet.

Soon. Soon.

Dear son,

You are miraculous at growing. I cannot believe it sometimes. After feeling that little foot of yours get stuck in my rib and then you kicking me to try and free yourself, I am convinced you will be a soccer player!! There is absolutely NO DOUBT in my mind now. You are so strong and active. I am shocked that you can still find ways to twist and turn in your little home even when there is little to no room.

I know at this time you're practicing your breathing by swallowing your amniotic fluid. Keep growing and getting stronger. It's getting closer and closer and I want you to be strong for your journey down and out. I'm getting beyond excited to meet you and so if everyone else. It will be nice to introduce you to the world:)

xxo

love mom

Week 27 and 28

Can you tell I'm having a hard time with this blogging thing. I keep wanting to update every week, but not every week does something fun happen. Usually, it's the same old, same old thing.

Except the good news I've received this past week. I did my glucose testing and my sugar was 78. This obviously means that I've passed with flying colors. Something inside of me told me I didn't have it, but I will admit to having a small ounce of doubt b/c I am a HUGE FAN of those oh so yummy and not-so-good for you muffins, donuts and pastries! I have this awful weakness when it comes to my hands grabbing one of those bites to eat and shoveling it down my throat! Haha..

I believe due to my consistent working out over the years, my body functions fairly well. Or, I'm just one of the lucky ones!

Needless to say, at the end of week 28, all is done. Rhogam shot done, (yes I am Rh-), glucose test done and other blood tests done.

I've been house hunting all the while. I'm trying very hard to find myself a 2 bedroom with a washer and dryer in the unit. The sad part about all this is that I have to leave the city in order to have it. It just isn't possible here in the city. Most places here are on the small side and don't include a washer and dryer. Not to mention the astronomical high rents here! I'm trying to be a savvy mom with my money and trying to really figure things out. I'm thinking about moving to Oakland. Although I NEVER thought I would move there. I've had nightmares about living there. However, after checking out some of the neighborhoods, I've been happily surprised. Very authentic, old and eclectic. Definitely like my taste. So, I'm hoping to get this out of the way within one month. I would prefer to move a month before giving birth so that I don't have to move or go and look at places while I have a newborn in tow! Can you imagine the struggle?!!

We'll see...so far it's been difficult and I haven't given birth yet:(

More pictures to come..Sorry i've been the slacker here, just not a tummy picture taking kind of girl I guess. My friends tell me I'll live to regret it, so I will get on it!!

Dear son,

I cannot believe how grown up you're getting with every passing day. I can feel when you're growing, as silly as that seems to some. I wonder what you're doing in there with your hands, it sometimes feels like you're rolling your fingers across my tummy and I've even thought for a moment I felt you turn around!

I continue to look at your 3D photo of your face and I swear you have my lips and your daddies nose. It honestly doesn't matter, as I won't be disappointed either way:) Your puppy dog, Sherlock is getting anxious about your arrival. He comes up and lay's his head on my tummy, as if he knows his introduction is right around the corner.

You're pretty fun to shop for. I can't go into any baby store and not walk out with some clothing for you! You're gonna have as many clothes as me. Goodness...

So, keep growing, but if I have one request that is lived out, PLEASE stop kicking me in the lower left of mommies tummy, you have this affinity with one of my organs and it hurts:)

xxo

Midwife Apt/month August

27.5 weeks, measuring at 28 centimeters. Heartbeat 140. His head is down. Weight gained 3.5 lbs since last appt.

Current weight= 138. Total weight gained thus far= 20 lbs.

My midwife appointment went good, but I forgot to have my blood drawn and to perform my sugar test. Ahhh...I love my memory these days!

Today, they drew my cbc, type and cross and Hgb. Wednesday is my sugar test!

Todays goal given to me by my midwife: find myself a duola, get enrolled in birthing classes and research pediatricians.

It's all written down:)

happy day!

Week 25 - 26

It's amazing to me the things that are happening in my body! I will admit, I'm not the biggest fan of being pregnant, but I can certainly appreciate the rapid, yet amazing changes that my body is going through. I feel like I am growing day by day and not week by week. Fun.

Rumors, rumors, rumors! I've heard every rumor in the book about things not to do or things to do while pregnant.

*Don't eat raw sprouts. I cannot tell you how tasty my raw sprout salad was that I munched on down in San Diego.

*Don't drink coffee. Honestly, there was no intention inside of me to give up the one cup or even the 2 shots of espresso that I offer myself every morning. I need that "jump" in the morning to start my day.

*Don't eat raw fish. Well, if I crave it, I'm going to eat it. I've eaten raw salmon about 4x while pregnant. My midwife reassured me to just stay away from the fish HIGH in mercury. Shark, Swordfish, King Mackeral and Tie fish. None of which I've eaten or plan to eat.

*Cook your vegetables. Hmm...COOK my veggies all the time? No. I love to eat raw broccoli and spinach, especially.

*Don't dye your hair. Yeh, really? I've dyed it going on three times now and after speaking with my midwife, she agreed that this is a fallacy.

*Don't paint your nails. I LOVE my manicures and pedicures. There's no way I am going to stop pampering myself and especially during pregnancy when I think women need it the most! Myth, also debunked by my midwife.

The list goes on and on. Thankfully I've not believed most things I've heard. I know my limits and I also know my adoration for certain things. I've always believed everything in moderation and I live my life accordingly:) The only thing I do actually worry about, are products and working around medications that are teratogenic. Safety is always my priority! Regardless if I'm carrying another life inside of me. But b/c of my little one, it's safe to assume, I'm doubling down on that:)

So the last couple of weeks and especially this week, I can feel the weight of the little one beginning to bear down on my feet at work. I'm finding myself a bit more tired, quicker while I'm working and my feet are killing me, three hours into a shift. And what is up with these weird and annoying leg pains I'm feeling? I finally was assured that this very bad burning and numb feeling to the right side directly next to my sternum is not heartburn. Yay, thankful me! It's just the stretching of my uterus and the unusual position of my son in the womb. So then why does it seem to burn more when I'm under stress? I can feel my muscle right there going into spasm. Bizarre! I have to admit, this is the one pain among all of my pregnancy pains that I cannot wait to say goodbye to. I've also began to have some Braxton hicks contractions. At first I didn't realize what was going on, but then I realized that "hey, these are BHC's". They've felt like very bad menstrual cramps and there is a slight tightening to my left abdomen. They're lasting about 1 minute and they range in painfulness. I've had a few that are more painful than others, but the majority of them are minor and I don't think about. They say it is preparing the cervix for ripening!

I'm curious to see what week 27 brings my way, as I move closer to my third trimester!

Dear son:

As you know, I've narrowed your name down to my two top choices. It's interesting to me when I ask you what you prefer, you send a kick or jab my way. Hah. I'm hoping you like them both and are not bias to one or the other. I love watching you move all over the place. It's bizarre to watch my belly jump and roll. I wonder if you're going to be a runner like me or a soccer/rugby player like your daddy. Either way, I can tell I have an athlete inside. I was talking to my colleagues the other day about how I wish I had a tiny camera to stick inside my womb so I can watch what you do when you're awake and playing. It was truly one of the most amazing things I've seen when I saw you on the second ultra sound; you were swallowing amniotic fluid, practicing your breathing for the world which you are preparing to be introduced to. Through the ultrasound, you had your hands together. When the tech tried to get a better picture of you by rattling the instrument, you moved your hands apart and then you put them right back together again. It seems you may have inherited some of that stubborn behavior from your daddy:) Lol... You're growing so fast and every day is a new day of experience for me. And with every passing day, I get more and more excited to meet you.

Love mommie<3

Level Two Ultrasound Pics

The first picture is a side profile of my baby boy. The above picture is a frontal picture of him. It was much more straight on and clearer, but the umbilical cord was in front of his face, so the tech turned the photo a bit in order to have a clear photo of his face.

I received these photos today, as I went for my level two ultrasound. I was allowed to watch the entire thing, which was totally amazing. I wasn't able to see the first one, so today was a HUGE deal for me. The ultrasound tech was great, she showed me the blood flow of the two arteries and one vein, the chambers of the heart, his bones, counted his fingers and toes and took some cool shots for me as a memory. I loved it! And, I almost missed it because I was running late; 30 minutes late to be exact. But thankfully they were ok with my tardiness:)

They said they didn't find any abnormalities, which made me feel very good:) Appointment went well.

24 weeks

Since everyone wants pictures and I live alone, it's been a challenge for me taking my own. I apologize and I promise to make more of an effort. And especially so in the "creative" area. Here are some pics of the past week.

I'm "officially" finished with my 24th week. I'm

so happy to be feelin' fine, like my old self. Although, I've barely worked out at all and that's definitely not like me at all! I just don't feel up to going to the gym and I'm losing a lot of muscle and becoming "soft". After the baby is born, I think I'm going to find the time to train and complete the Italian marathon! Something that's been a

long time dream of mine and something I was training for before I broke my right sesamoid bone in my great toe yea

rs ago.

Well, this week we've accomplished a lot. I finally completed my registry and honestly, I cannot tell for sure if it is what it's suppose to be, as this is my first child. Doing my registry was fun, but also a huge challenge for me! I'm not sure if I've listed the things I will need as a new mother. I went ahead and put gift cards on my registry in case one of my lovely mommie friends notices that I'm missing something. They can then tell me what it is and I can use the gift cards to purchase that "must-have" product. God, I certainly hope this isn't going to be a sign of what the start of mommie-hood will be like for me. Just having a tough time putting my registry together.....hah. It seems so simple to some people.

This week my cousin sent me some cute boy clothes and a pair of sandals. I also received a near new snug ride car seat and some other clothes and useful things for the baby. It's getting exciting! I feel like a kid in a candy store when I'm out shopping for him. I finally picked out the crib bedding I want too. It's neutral and has no theme. I've never been a "theme" kind of person and I love earth tones, so that's what I'm going for!

Will all this time to think about names, I believe by the end of next week I will have his name picked out. I have it narrowed down to three names and I love them all. I've decided not to tell anyone except my close friends. There are so many people who tell me they don't like this or they don't like that or why I should go for something other than what I'm going for. It's not worth the stress.

So on Monday, I get to have a second ultrasound. They didn't see any abnormalities with the first ultrasound, but I didn't actually get to see it and I was a bit upset with the tech, so my midwife went ahead and scheduled me for a level two so I would be able to watch the entire thing and get some good pictures of him. I'm very excited for it:) I'm hoping they can video tape it, like some places do. We'll see. Hopefully he'll have his thumb in his mouth! He was moving around a lot during the first one and so the tech wasn't able to get may good pictures of him. Eh...come on baby, show mommie you're sucking on your thumb!

I was at target shopping for some home things and realized what a neat idea it would be if I made a scrap book for him. All the way from the start of my pregnancy to the very end. It's time to contact my aunt in Phoenix for some input, as she is an AMAZING scrapbooker! So far I have some cute scrap booking things and ideas. I'll keep you posted...

This past week, I gained 1.5 lbs, I measured in at 24 inches, similar to my gestational age and apparently good. http://www.pregnology.com/faralong.php?month=11&day=12&year=2009

So far, the only major downfall this week was the pressure of him growing and pushing my stomach out. Ouch! There are only 103 days to go until I get to meet him!! It sounds like far off, but it is shockingly close! He's constantly kicking up a storm and turning in my stomach. It feels bizarre and I mean, really bizarre! I wish I had a tiny camera to watch what he is doing inside my stomach!

Week 23

So when I'm done with this week, I will be 6 1/2 months! Geesh, I'm totally amazed at how fast time is going by!!

Today I had my first midwife appointment since leaving the other midwifery birth center (which I am totally bummed about) and achieving insurance status. I went to see a very "natural, low intervention" birth center. It's run by midwives and there are three MD's. I'm really trying to have my baby as naturally as I can. I don't want all the interventions that past western medicine is known for. However, finding a hospital that is willing to help me achieve as close to my birth plan as possible has been such a chore.

Today however, I think I may have found what I wanted. I had a great midwife interview and the birth center has a birthing tub which I am looking for. It's nice and spacious and I got a really good feeling about the entire "idea" and the practitioners themselves. The only downside is that I cannot actually birth in the water tub, I can only "labor" in the tub and then get out of the tub to birth. Crazy! I don't know what woman wants to be in labor in the water with her babies head crowning and then having to get out to birth. Booo...

A little weird, but it is as close as I can get unless I want to drive to Davis, CA where they do birth babies in the water.

All if good with my growth. I weigh 134.5, I have gained 15 lbs. I was measured at 23 inches, which matches my 23 weeks gestation perfectly. Good news. Glucose testing is in 4 weeks.

I also went down for my first ultrasound. I don't know why, but I was so nervous! The lady told me I looked nervous too. The ultra sound was cool. I didn't know if I was going to cry or not. I didn't, I was just blown away that I was looking at something inside of me. All of my mothers reading this can totally relate to the "awe" of it all. Even being a nurse, I was taken aback.

So yes, the big question as to what am I having is finally being answered. It was solidified by one very good picture! I'm having a BOY:) Yay times a thousand!!!

Now, my friends can relax and have a glass of wine for me, my mom can shop for her grandson and I can refer to my little one as my son. Not to mention, I can now work on and finish my registry and find him a name.

C-O-N-G-R-A-T-U-L-A-T-I-O-N-S to one of my besties, Harumi who is now 11 weeks pregnant! I'm so happy for you and Peter. It's going to be nice to travel this journey with someone I love dearly!

Month Five

As I continue on, this month involves weeks 18-21. At the beginning of this month I was really beginning to feel the differences and changes setting in. I started having these wacky mood swings and becoming "snarky" to anyone, or anything that displeased me in any way. I was also beginning to feel the pressure in my stomach from the uterus enlarging. Did I mention that it is very uncomfortable? Indeed. It feels like someone is inside your stomach pushing out, as a matter of fact, that's pretty dead on...haha. I was also feeling the "fullness" that comes along with that pressure. I learned fairly quickly on that there is no more of this sitting down with a plate of food and clearing my plate. At this point, a few bites is pretty much all I can handle at times. It's difficult to be absolutely starving and not being able to chow down! And I hear it only gets worse.

I'm now going to the bathroom quite a bit. I have a small bladder normally, but with the little one inside me, it is now half the size! The baby has finally started making their own hormones, which in turn allows mommie to feel much better. At the beginning of the month, I was still not feeling that excellent feeling of being back to myself, but in the 2nd week of this month, I really felt good. I can now stay up late again as I used to and not be completely drained. It feels fine to be me these days. With just one exception; leg pains. One major leg pain on my right thigh which feels like I have a pinched nerve. If you've ever had a pinched nerve, you know that it feels like a burning sensation with numbness and tingling. I have that same sensation directly under my sternum on the right side. I've been to the chiropractor twice this month because of it. He told me that my muscle close to my ribs on the right side keeps spasming due to the "relaxin" that my body is producing at high rates! If you're not aware, a pregnant woman's body is much more loose than when she is not pregnant. Which means, more adjustments for me.

Overall, the baby is kicking constantly and all over the place. I feel kicks that feel like they are in the back towards my rear, up towards the top by my sternum and really low. I wonder how this baby is doing it. Mr or Miss little active. It makes me happy to know they're moving all over the place.

Before I begin my week by week blogs, I want to mention that I decided to forego genetic testing. Mainly because I missed the small window of time for everything and I was without insurance. If I had insurance, I would have gone through some form of testing. Now, I'm hoping for a healthy and happy baby and that is all.

Month Four

So it's "official", I'm in my second trimester. This month is made up of weeks 14-17 and is suppose to be where I'll feel back to my normal self. Or at least "better" again. But by the end of this month, I was still having periods of nausea and I was still very tired. I had more motivation during the day, but it quickly went away at the end of the day; when the errands were run and I had time to actually go to the gym. Or, perhaps I was being lazy?!? Hah, I am finding that pregnancy and lazy are going hand in hand these days!

This month marked the first experience I had with the little life inside of me moving. I felt a few jabs here and there which at first, I couldn't decipher between gas or actual movement. I realized, it was movement. Although sporadic, it was my baby moving. And believe me, it's a trip! Sometimes it made me laugh and I always loved being pregnant at that moment. I found myself always wanting the baby to move so I could put all the aches and pains of pregnancy behind me. During these weeks, I couldn't feel the baby moving as much because he/she still has a ton of room to float and move around in.

During the first two weeks of this month, I was still wearing regular clothing. My breasts had become noticeably larger and much more firm, Yeh! One side effect of pregnancy, I just don't mind:) I think my hips have widen a bit too, but I can still fit into my size 4 jeans and regular shirts. By the 16th week, while I was visiting my parents for their 50th wedding anniversary party out of state, I was beginning to feel uncomfortable in my jeans and "gave in" to purchasing my first pair of maternity jeans. Ahhhh...comfort, comfort, comfort! No one bothered to tell me just how comfortable these jeans would turn out to be. I felt so much better wearing them; less restricted. I can't say that I would love to wear them even when not pregnant, but I can certainly recommend investing in a few good pairs. I spent about $80 or a little more on either pair. I still am not showing in my belly. Shamefully, I didn't take any pictures until I hit the sixth month.

Month Three

This month begins weeks 9-12. I am really looking forward to the end of this month, because I've heard how women generally feel much better and the nausea seems to dissipate at the end of the month.

During this month, I'm still not feeling 100% and I'm still not working out like I have in the past. I miss the gym, I miss the adrenaline and I miss my saunas and stretching sessions. I think I went to the gym during this month, 3x and I went in both the sauna and steam room before I knew that I wasn't suppose to. I seem to come up short on most information it seems. You know how the saying goes, "a day late and a dollar short". Both that saying and "murphy's law" always seem to pertain to me and my life.

I'm still feeling nauseous and still very tired. I'm becoming anxious about telling my friends and my family. There is that "safe zone" in which a woman who is expecting, can share her information with her friends and family members. Especially being that I'm older, they say. Which by the way, I don't believe and never have. But, I waited anyway.

At 12 weeks, I started to let my friends know. It was such a weird experience. You would not believe how many people gather over a baby! It's quite energizing actually. I have been surrounded by women who have all given birth 1-6 times in their lives. Their support, coupled with their information on becoming a new mommie-to-be has been exhilarating and has given pregnancy a whole different look. Regardless of the horrible side effects it brings with it.

Let me back track and say that right after I found out I was pregnant, I had a day of "hell" at work and I had no explanation for my "green" appearance than to come right out and tell my manager and fellow colleagues. I needed to grasp onto something in order to make myself look competent at what I do. in other words, I wasn't focusing at work and the people I work with, knew something was wrong. Because of that, I came clean and shared my big news!

Month Two

Much like month one and not much difference. At this point, I'm still wearing my own jeans, shirts and jackets. The only thing that really changed for me was at least I was having "good" days, instead of just all "bad".

During this month, I began checking this nice little ticker with great information.

http://www.pregnology.com/faralong.php?month=11&day=12&year=2009

It really gave me a whole new perspective on life and how incredibly special it is. I mean, most people don't think about how or what goes on and how truly "special" it is.

Month One

Technically, by the time a woman finds out she is pregnant, she's already four weeks pregnant. So whether or not you want to call my first month, month two, I will not object! At the time I found out, I was 4 weeks about 5 days along.

This month was spent adjusting to the idea of "becoming a mother" and how I would do this on my own. The father and I had broke up, so I chose to go about this on my own. I wanted to see what all of my friends were raving about when they discussed "parenting". With that, I decided take advantage of the little life that was forming inside of me and become a mother.

I have to say, this month was mainly dedicated to feeling awful and sleeping. I was so tired all the time, I was out of energy and I was terribly nauseous. I remember some days at work being absolutely starved and having made an incredibly healthy lunch, but only being able to sit and stare at it; not eat it. I never vomited, but I wish I had. I also had these horrible headaches that felt like migraines and I never get headaches. I had horrible gas pains too. I stopped working out and going to the gym all together. This was difficult for me, because prior to pregnancy, I was running 30 miles a week and lifting weights regularly. I've always been athletic and in good shape, but I just couldn't get myself out of bed, nor could I find the energy at all to be anywhere but my bed! All I remember were my friends and colleagues telling me "this will only last a short time and it will get better by month three." Month three, are you serious? Noooooo! I'm just at the beginning and I feel "weird" and just not myself. I honestly thought I would only feel weird for maybe a few weeks and then my body would adjust and I would be back on track to feeling normal again. Hah! NOT the case at all. I know I'm a baby. I remember thinking to myself..."I really hope what people say about being a parent is true and it's all worth it in the end, because I'm feeling pretty awful."

During month one, I tried keeping and eating saltine crackers at my bed for the nausea. They didn't work. I drank ginger ale to help with the gas pains and that didn't work either. I tried to space out my days at work and have one or two days in between shifts to rest and sleep. Great idea, but I was never able to catch up on my sleep. I felt like and looked like I wasn't sleeping hardly at all. So to those of you women who are just in their first month wondering if life gets better and you begin to feel like yourself again, read on....

My beginning of half way there

I finally have the opportunity to begin my blog that I've wanted; half way through my pregnancy. I owe my "get off your lazy rear-end and make time" to do your blog attitude, to my mother and my closest friends. In my defense I would like to point out that I have not felt very good up until now. I didn't want to do much of anything aside from sleep and work and even during work, I'd rather have been sleeping.

However, the idea of a personal pregnancy blog that I could look back and read and laugh at, even if late, sounds too great to pass up.

So here I am and I apologize if we're playing quite a bit of catch up here. However, I promise to do my best to make you laugh with me and not at me.

Let me start out by telling you who I am and give you a little bit of detail about my life. I conceived at the age of 39, now I am 40. I was not using any form of birth control, nor was I trying to conceive. Ahhh, the irony here. I was being reckless and not practicing "safe" sex with my partner. We were together for a year before this little bundle of joy was conceived.

I think if I break my blog posts into months instead of weeks as I plan to do once I'm caught up, it will be easier to follow.

So let's go back to when it all began. I was in NYC, visiting a few of my best friends and my other friends. Upon arrival to JFK, I noticed I was feeling a bit "under the weather"; I was tired and crampy and I felt like a fever was coming on. I wasn't really in the celebratory mood and all I wanted to do was sleep. I had cramps and could tell that I was getting ready to start my period any day. It was disappointing. I mean, I just arrived in NYC to see my friends and celebrate the beginning of my 40's and yet, I was going to start my period! I think it's safe to assume that most woman can feel my disappointment at that time. Who wants to feel crampy and bloaty with a headache, less energy and a bit of an attitude when you're on your birthday vacation? Not me, nor most women.

Needless to say, my period never came. I remember saying to my bestie, "I'm regular and I'm worried, because what if I'm pregnant?" I just wasn't sure how,

because...well, here's something to get you laughing. HELLOOO.....

I was having sex on days prior to and after my ovulation, because we were not using protection.

Honestly, it worked pretty well for awhile because I'm regular and I have something called "mittelschmerz" which is pain during ovulation. So, I was aware when I was ovulating. BUT the kicker here is that I last had sex with my partner two days after my period ended which at that time, I should not have been ovulating. So ladies, don't try this method ever if you don't want to become "knocked-up".

I chose not to buy a pregnancy test in NYC, because I was afraid that what I was thinking was true. I waited until I got home and took a test. It of course came out positive. And in light of the "fright" I was feeling, I chose to take five pregnancy tests between that day, that night and the following day. Yes! Every single test showed two lines, which meant I was indeed pregnant!